Today I had to unfollow a musician on Twitter because he tweeted that CM Punk is the greatest wrestler ever. Like, now and in the past and in the future.
And I can't follow you on Twitter if you're going to be so wrong about subjects that I care about so much.
Dearest CM Punk,
You are a twat. I will never forgive you for disrespecting HBK (bringing up his former drug abuse is just bad form) or for bad mouthing Triple H. You are a chump and my twelve year old sister could take you.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Monday, May 23, 2011
Thursday, May 19, 2011
No news is good news, right?
Mel is in Canada for the summer, so I will probably be doing most of the updating of this blog (while also asking her questions such as "do they have grocery stores in Canada?", "what time is it there?", and "have you seen any yaks?"). I am still cranky about Christian losing his title to dumb Randy Orton. And if there have been any recent developments in this storyline, I wouldn't know because I am still boycotting Smackdown. Christian is so cute! How could they take the title away from him?! WHERE IS THE PEEP SHOW?!!?
The Miz is still annoying and dumb and I don't understand how on Earth he is still involved in any sort of title match. Alex Riley needs to get a real job. I'm hoping that they will finally end this whole Michael Cole/Jerry Lawler spectacle soon, now that the All-American Speech Impediment (Jack Swagger) has abandoned his job as Cole's back up. I am still waiting on The Undertaker and Triple H to come back and do something, anything, to make me happy about the WWE again. The one thing that I have been pleased with is seeing Kane and Big Show on RAW again. I love them both and I like it when they kick CM Punk's ass. It is simply not believable that CM Punk would get the drop on either of these men (even with creepy Batista look alike in tow), so I fast forward through those dumb parts and pretend they didn't happen.
I recently acquired a Macho Man Randy Savage action figure from the 80's. It is awesome and big enough to fight my Wolverine action figure, who was previously undefeated due to his large size and ability to growl. Seriously, he can growl and say badass Wolverine stuff.
I am probably going to start integrating TNA talk into this blog as well. I am the only one that watches TNA out of us, because I have the love for Chyna (I have not seen her porn, as others have, so I am not put off by that). There are pros and cons of TNA (recently renamed iMPACT!). Pros would be: Chyna returning to wrestling, Mick Foley, Ric Flair, and Mickie James. They all have prominent story lines and were some of my favorite WWE wrestlers that were let go/couldn't wrestle anymore for a variety of reasons. Cons: everything else. Their branding is horrible. They have a tag team named "Beer Money", which is essentially a rip off of Stone Cold Steve Austin's entire wrestling and real life persona. I despise Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff. But it is interesting to have some new themes and wrestlers to love and hate and feel 11 about again.
The Miz is still annoying and dumb and I don't understand how on Earth he is still involved in any sort of title match. Alex Riley needs to get a real job. I'm hoping that they will finally end this whole Michael Cole/Jerry Lawler spectacle soon, now that the All-American Speech Impediment (Jack Swagger) has abandoned his job as Cole's back up. I am still waiting on The Undertaker and Triple H to come back and do something, anything, to make me happy about the WWE again. The one thing that I have been pleased with is seeing Kane and Big Show on RAW again. I love them both and I like it when they kick CM Punk's ass. It is simply not believable that CM Punk would get the drop on either of these men (even with creepy Batista look alike in tow), so I fast forward through those dumb parts and pretend they didn't happen.
I recently acquired a Macho Man Randy Savage action figure from the 80's. It is awesome and big enough to fight my Wolverine action figure, who was previously undefeated due to his large size and ability to growl. Seriously, he can growl and say badass Wolverine stuff.
I am probably going to start integrating TNA talk into this blog as well. I am the only one that watches TNA out of us, because I have the love for Chyna (I have not seen her porn, as others have, so I am not put off by that). There are pros and cons of TNA (recently renamed iMPACT!). Pros would be: Chyna returning to wrestling, Mick Foley, Ric Flair, and Mickie James. They all have prominent story lines and were some of my favorite WWE wrestlers that were let go/couldn't wrestle anymore for a variety of reasons. Cons: everything else. Their branding is horrible. They have a tag team named "Beer Money", which is essentially a rip off of Stone Cold Steve Austin's entire wrestling and real life persona. I despise Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff. But it is interesting to have some new themes and wrestlers to love and hate and feel 11 about again.
Saturday, May 14, 2011
...
Sorry for the lack of updates. Mel and I have been busy. Mel with important school stuff, me with drinking and opening birthday presents. Life is tough, you know.
ANYWAY, I don't really have anything to say except that I am pissed off that the WWE took away Christian's title after FIVE DAYS to give it to douchebag Randy Orton. and I am protesting Smackdown because of it. Also, where is my beloved Triple H??
In other news, I started watching TNA because I heard they're bringing Chyna back! What!
Lastly, R Truth is dumb.
ANYWAY, I don't really have anything to say except that I am pissed off that the WWE took away Christian's title after FIVE DAYS to give it to douchebag Randy Orton. and I am protesting Smackdown because of it. Also, where is my beloved Triple H??
In other news, I started watching TNA because I heard they're bringing Chyna back! What!
Lastly, R Truth is dumb.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
WWE DRAFTS ARE ALMOST BETTER THAN CHRISTMAS
I say almost because when things like John Cena AND Randy Orton getting drafted to Smackdown happen, I feel as glorious and excited as I am when I get to open my Christmas presents and one of them turns out to be an Indiana Jones hat (true story). HOWEVER, it is the complete opposite when John Cena gets drafted back to RAW at the end of the episode. Really, WWE? Must you tease me like this? It's like you're taking away my Indiana Jones moment!
Overall, the draft seemed really exciting at the time, but now I'm getting a little cranky about it. I was pleased that the Big Show and Rey Mysterio were drafted to RAW (I am itching to see a Rey Mysterio/Sin Cara battle take place - but now that won't happen because they drafted Sin Cara to Smackdown, which seems unfair. He looks so promising!), but was really bummed that Mark Henry was drafted to Smackdown instead of RAW. And I have no interest in Alberto Del Rio at all, much less dumb Jack Swagger. Seriously, someone is going to have to make sure he and Dolph Ziggler wear different colored shirts so that everyone can tell them apart (JUST KIDDING! Dolph got that weird haircut. Maybe they made him cut his hair in anticipation of bringing his doppelganger to RAW?!).
I am really upset that Kane and the Undertaker are still on Smackdown. ALL I WANT IS TO BRING THEM BACK TO RAW. If the Undertaker retires and he is still on Smackdown, I will never forgive you, Vince McMahon.
Also, BRING ME CHRISTIAN!!! I MISS THE PEEP SHOW.
Overall, the draft seemed really exciting at the time, but now I'm getting a little cranky about it. I was pleased that the Big Show and Rey Mysterio were drafted to RAW (I am itching to see a Rey Mysterio/Sin Cara battle take place - but now that won't happen because they drafted Sin Cara to Smackdown, which seems unfair. He looks so promising!), but was really bummed that Mark Henry was drafted to Smackdown instead of RAW. And I have no interest in Alberto Del Rio at all, much less dumb Jack Swagger. Seriously, someone is going to have to make sure he and Dolph Ziggler wear different colored shirts so that everyone can tell them apart (JUST KIDDING! Dolph got that weird haircut. Maybe they made him cut his hair in anticipation of bringing his doppelganger to RAW?!).
I am really upset that Kane and the Undertaker are still on Smackdown. ALL I WANT IS TO BRING THEM BACK TO RAW. If the Undertaker retires and he is still on Smackdown, I will never forgive you, Vince McMahon.
Also, BRING ME CHRISTIAN!!! I MISS THE PEEP SHOW.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
I miss the belly button tattoo.
Dudes. When you Google Mason Ryan (don't judge me for Googling wrestlers! I'm a curious girl!), some of the automatic drop down option thingers are "Mason Ryan Batista", "Mason Ryan Batista's Brother", "Mason Ryan looks like Batista", and my personal favorite "is Mason Ryan really Batista?". This makes me laugh really hard, as I was just joking about that earlier. Mason Ryan is a creepy rip off of Batista, but he doesn't even have a weird belly button tattoo to make fun of. He's just all angry and large and creepy and has the psycho face. Seriously, I never thought I would fear for Randy Orton, but last night's RAW brought me to new levels of concern for oily Randy Orton's welfare. I mean, I think that gang ups are really obnoxious on either front (I even frowned upon them when Evolution took part in them), but Randy Orton looked like a sad sack of tattooed meat that had melted due to awkward weather conditions. And then all of New Nexus (new Nexus, old Nexus - in any form, all Nexus is Bad Nexus in my opinion) took on the creepy crazy face! New Batista, CM Punk! Jeez dudes. Jeez.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
THIS POST IS RATED R.
Hi. I am back from vacation. It was awesome, in case you were wondering. It was still awesome even if you weren't wondering. Being in Atlanta for the RAW following Wrestlemania was epic on so many levels that I can't even explain it. You will just have to go and see if the puddle of pee is still underneath my seat from where I constantly wet my pants that night. Triple H, The Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin and a main event announcement for WM28 - yes please! The only bummer was that the Undertaker wasn't there and Michael Cole was. I wanted my friend Alexa to witness the Taker's intro - because it is the creepiest thing ever. Also, I want him to be OK. I was extremely relieved that Triple H didn't retire. Though he was noticeably absent from RAW last night and then EDGE retired! So, in the end, this still kind of sucks. I love Edge. I love Christian. I miss the Peep Show. I am getting off track.
Getting into the Philips Arena was an experience unto itself. Imagine trying to cram thousands of sweaty, over excited wrestling fans into four entrances of a building. Added to our trouble was the fact that we had to find the box office and the Philips Arena is the CNN building, so 78% of my attention was semi-devoted to spotting Anderson Cooper and trying to count how many WE HEART TED TURNER signs exist in the city of Atlanta itself (note: I am not hating, as I am a Braves fan. I just think it's mildly amusing how prominent he is in the city). I was annoyed when the Miz interrupted Stone Cold, as that is so rude. I was less than impressed with the Tough Enough crew (which, admittedly, I haven't had a chance to watch yet, so I'm still behind on whether or not they're actually worth anything). The usual chaos ensued when Michael Cole opened his mouth. The Rock was awesome. There was no dark match though, which was disappointing but understandable.
Last night's RAW was sort of a bummer. Edge retired and R Truth is somehow a number one contender? Plus John Cena get away from the Championship Belt for five minutes, jeez. It's nice that they're trying to bring somebody new into the mix, but neither John Morrison nor R Truth are really that entertaining. At least Dolph Ziggler has that hilarious haircut. The only real highlight for me (other than JR being on, Lawler pinning Jack Swagger - seriously! did you see his face? PRICELESS.) was the introduction of team APPLE. I was very happy to see Mark Henry, who always entertains me, and Santino! I hope that they make APPLE a main storyline. I could use some comedy in my wrestling life. The Rock probably won't be up in the wrestling grill anymore and neither will Stone Cold. Only time will tell about Triple H.
On the very sad note, I really love and appreciate Edge. As a wrestling fan, he was the best heel that a girl could ask for. He both enraged and excited me since I was a little girl, drooling over his strob light entrance, long hair, and tight pants. He will be sorely missed. And I'm going to watch my Edge DVDs tonight. and maybe cry into my beer a little. Cheers to the Rated R Superstar.
Getting into the Philips Arena was an experience unto itself. Imagine trying to cram thousands of sweaty, over excited wrestling fans into four entrances of a building. Added to our trouble was the fact that we had to find the box office and the Philips Arena is the CNN building, so 78% of my attention was semi-devoted to spotting Anderson Cooper and trying to count how many WE HEART TED TURNER signs exist in the city of Atlanta itself (note: I am not hating, as I am a Braves fan. I just think it's mildly amusing how prominent he is in the city). I was annoyed when the Miz interrupted Stone Cold, as that is so rude. I was less than impressed with the Tough Enough crew (which, admittedly, I haven't had a chance to watch yet, so I'm still behind on whether or not they're actually worth anything). The usual chaos ensued when Michael Cole opened his mouth. The Rock was awesome. There was no dark match though, which was disappointing but understandable.
Last night's RAW was sort of a bummer. Edge retired and R Truth is somehow a number one contender? Plus John Cena get away from the Championship Belt for five minutes, jeez. It's nice that they're trying to bring somebody new into the mix, but neither John Morrison nor R Truth are really that entertaining. At least Dolph Ziggler has that hilarious haircut. The only real highlight for me (other than JR being on, Lawler pinning Jack Swagger - seriously! did you see his face? PRICELESS.) was the introduction of team APPLE. I was very happy to see Mark Henry, who always entertains me, and Santino! I hope that they make APPLE a main storyline. I could use some comedy in my wrestling life. The Rock probably won't be up in the wrestling grill anymore and neither will Stone Cold. Only time will tell about Triple H.
On the very sad note, I really love and appreciate Edge. As a wrestling fan, he was the best heel that a girl could ask for. He both enraged and excited me since I was a little girl, drooling over his strob light entrance, long hair, and tight pants. He will be sorely missed. And I'm going to watch my Edge DVDs tonight. and maybe cry into my beer a little. Cheers to the Rated R Superstar.
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